I swear by the literary belief that says an avid reader makes an excellent writer. On the voyage of being better at writing, I started reading extensively. Amidst the journey, I came across a lot of books, some of which were an innocent pastime whilst some left me questioning about the principles that I’d been abiding upon ever since the tenderness of my childhood.
One of such books that changed the way I perceived the universe is titled “As a Man Thinketh” by James Allen. I particularly fancied the opening quote, the aphorism, that says “As a man thinketh in his heart so is he.”
In a layperson’s terms, it would translate to – You are what you think. You might question the relevance of this quote to the topic that this article is based upon. First, let’s get this confusion over with.
Divorce is looked upon with a great magnitude of negativity. What hinders the spirit of “moving-on” of the divorcees is the baseless discussion of it by the group which is nowhere involved in the process- the society. This causes a lot of hindrance when the divorcees want to get back in the dating game. Apart from that, the potential dating candidates are likely to find the idea of dating a divorcee repulsive.
It’s not entirely the fault of the society but a part of it is also to be blamed on the shallowness of your mindset. Correct me if I am wrong but as per your perception, it so appears that a person who just got out of a serious relationship is unfit for dating, isn’t it?
Dear conservative society, if the world were to run in accordance with your beliefs, there would be a lot of divorced men and women who would die alone. And more so, if Karma hits you, you might be the one who would have the same fate.
Coming back to the aphorism by James Allen, the narrowness of your mind reflects how shallow a person you are. In order to uplift your standards as a human, it’s time to adopt new beliefs and not stigmatise those who have been through a painstaking process of a divorce.
In fact, you’ll be amazed to see how dating a divorcee would make your life ten folds better because of the expertise they have in terms of commitment and resolving petty issues over which most of the high-school couples often end their relationships.
What could the perks of dating a newly separated man be?
I’m here to provide some tips on and benefits of dating a divorced man. Let’s go ahead and take a reading.
Table of Contents (Quick Navigation)
- 1. They Don’t Live in a Fairy-tale Land
- 2. They Can Commit
- 3. They Are Aware of How Partnership Works
- 4. They Have the Communication and Cooperation Skills about Leading a Joint Life
- 5. They Understand the Positive Effects of Emotional Intimacy
- 6. They Know the Essence of Having a Well-kept Home
1. They Don’t Live in a Fairy-tale Land
Divorced men are well aware of all the potential hurdles in a relationship based on their past experience. They have a high level of maturity when it comes to fulfilling the desires of their partners.
They know that relationships aren’t based on the fantasies of the unicorns and white horses but on the constant endeavors of the parties at both ends of the relationship.
2. They Can Commit
Marriage is an institution that takes a high level of commitment- 100% of it actually. I’m not trying to scare you but that’s what it is.
But that’s when the benefit of dating a divorced person comes into play. Based on the experience of the previous marriage, their commitment can’t be questioned ( unless of course, the marriage ended because they cheated on their wife!).
It implies that you can do whatever you want to and let them do the same without worrying about their level of commitment.
3. They Are Aware of How Partnership Works
A failed marriage can be a pool of relationship lessons for divorced men. They know what women want from a relationship and what keeps them happy.
Not only are they aware of what makes a marriage work but also what doesn’t. They are likely to apply similar logics whilst dealing with the partnership issues.
They’ll invest their emotions and share their time with you such that the hurdles of whatever the kind they might be may be avoided.
If anything, they don’t want a second failed relationship. So, they’ll do anything to everything to make things work.
4. They Have the Communication and Cooperation Skills about Leading a Joint Life
Right from managing the joint finances to the time-schedules for picking and dropping the kids to and from schools, they are good at cooperation with their partners.
Also, they know what needs to be communicated and the communication of what would lead to a chaos. In simpler terms, they know when to keep their mouth shut.
Their skills will work wonders for the relationship because relationships fail because of the improper communication and cooperation skills, more often than not.
5. They Understand the Positive Effects of Emotional Intimacy
Unlike the majority of single men looking for casual hookups, divorced men will look for something more than the physical intimacy.
They know that relationship entails both physical and emotional intimacy, sometimes more of the latter than the former.
So, they’ll give you what you want. They’ll be your therapist when you’re feeling emotionally troubled and they’ll fool around with you when you’re in the mood for having fun.
6. They Know the Essence of Having a Well-kept Home
I have a mild OCD and I have a problem with sleazy, disorganised people. The kind who leave wet towels on the bed, stuff unfolded clothes in the closet and don’t clean the dust off the furniture, you know?
Well, I’m quite young and not looking for a relationship as of now, you can have all the available, organised men- especially the divorced ones!
They live in a well-managed household and you’ll never need to ask them to organise anything because they’ll take notice of it way ahead of you.
In the movie called “Friends with Kids”, the character Kurt played by Edward Burns is a divorced man who you’d want to swoon over. He might make you want to date a divorced man if my article doesn’t ( but I hope it does). Just saying!
Now, you might want to date the divorced man who has been laying his eyes on you and about whom you’ve been having second thoughts since much longer than you can remember.
Why are you still here? Go, get him!