What Does It Mean When You Dream about Your Ex-boyfriend

The word “Dream” is utterly enigmatic on its own. Science hasn’t been able to explain with absolute accuracy and certainty about the reason behind the occurrence of dreams.

I am a lucid dreamer. There was this time when I dreamt of my exam results and I scored exactly the same marks. I was taken aback by the incident. Talk about dreaming about a celebrity crush or a hot neighbor next door, or anything else that makes you feel alive and jollier than ever before- I’ve had it all.

I posted a Facebook status the other day of one my dreams.  The plot was quite simple. It appeared that I was dating Harry Styles and my, oh, my, I couldn’t have asked for more. Actually, I could have and I would. Ahem! I’d have my version of a dream date with the lad and all the ladies would correlate with me. Wouldn’t you, girls?

After all, we CAN’T STOP THE FEELING! Can we? And that’s that.

It’s no sin to dream. We all dream of a variety of things. We dream of people who we’ve never had an encounter with. We hear the voices never before heard.

Some people hate it when they dream. I don’t. I don’t see the harm. It’s like watching another episode of ONE TREE HILL in your own customized version. Wowwee!!

It’s all fun and games until we dream of something bad-and by bad, I mean extremely bad. Make a guess? Yes, it’s the creepy /not-so-creepy ex that I’m talking about.

I, in no conscious state of my mind, would spend even a tad bit of my nervous energy thinking about my ex.

If anything, I have a feeling of nothingness towards him in my heart. Relatable? Can we raise our voices against “that face”? No! Not worth the vocal energy.

SUGAR? No, Please! Sorry, Adam Levine- if my ex-boyfriend is the sugar you’re talking about.

Moving on, we all have been told about the significance of dreams by our seniors, elders or some YouTube video. Let’s not forget the astrologers who have a wide explanation on the theory of dreams.

But today, here and now, we shall interpret the dreams that we have of our Ex(s). Don’t miss out on any point, because every point counts!

Here we go! *In Lady Gaga’s voice*

 1. You Miss Your Ex

missing someone

I think love is a blessing in disguise. Your heart screams out his name, you fall in love, you imagine having a unicorn in your room, you write journals stating and restating how beautiful a soul he is.

But have you given a thought to why it’s called falling in love and not rising in love?

Some might have an opinion that I’m reiterating a rather cliched topic but it’s all cliched until it becomes applicable to your life.

Well, to cut to the chase, it’s called so because he leaves someday, shattering your dreams and breaking your heart into a billion pieces. Or maybe you choose to opt out because you don’t feel the way you used to.

Your face doesn’t get lit with a sparkling smile when you hear his name. Seeing him doesn’t excite you. You fall out of love.

Your heart is crying for help. You feel worse than ever before and begin questioning your decision about being with him. You regret. Tears roll down your cheeks. Your relationship fails and so do you.

You fall in a vicious circle of unhappiness and there doesn’t seem to be a way out of it. We fall in love, we fall out of love. In all cases, all we’re doing is failing and falling.

There’s a void left in your heart. You miss the companionship you used to have in his form. You miss the past relationship and the goodness it contained. You don’t seem to let it go.

You miss him. You’re delusional.

Your subconscious expresses the unexplored and unexpressed desire of your heart whilst you are sleeping.

It seems logical, doesn’t it?

2. You Are Processing the Break-up


They say only fools fall in love. Do you know what else they think to be a fool’s deed? Crying over the spilt cup of milk!

But we’re only humans after all. We need time in abundance to not care and move on in life.

Emotional healing is a tedious process. Nobody likes holding on to the broken promises and pondering over the thoughts of a broken relationship.

But unfortunately, we aren’t left with any other option.

We don’t get over things in a matter of a day. It requires time-a lot of it, as I mentioned earlier.

Your vulnerability gets out in the air and you start carrying your heart in your sleeves.

It would have been better if, like a small boat, the ashes of the burnt relationship could sail to the other side of the shore. Don’t you think?

But that doesn’t happen in real life. Wrecking balls hit your heart every time and remind you of the break-up. To make things even worse, you start dreaming of him. But why?

I have an answer. It’s your mind’s way of slowly and gradually releasing you from the past relationship and allowing you to move on.

Your heart and mind synchronise to help you eliminate the toxic feelings associated with the past relationship.

But in the end, it all depends on your willpower. You might feel anxious and tend to lose control at times. You don’t have to fight your feelings. Embrace them. Let your heart beat and let your mind think about him. It’s a detoxification procedure. It’ll eventually get cleared out of your system.

Talking about your dream again, if the past relationship was somewhat unhealthy, your mind maybe telling you to open up your heart to someone else and allow them to make you feel happier.

But that leads to the chances of jumping into a rebound relationship. I don’t recommend in doing so.

Why do you think Beyonce released the Single Ladies track in the first place? I hope that you see this through.

You should be in charge of your own happiness.

Ladies, I believe it’s high time you started exploring the alternative ways to build up your individual identity. Consider doing it for me, will you?

3. You Have Fears of Being Hurt Again


Do you think of him when you’re all alone, all the hurtful feelings you had to go through whilst he called it off?

Could you hear your heart crying out saying “Please don’t go”, whilst he left you? You’ve been through so much. You don’t know me and I don’t know you, but I heart you. You’ll come out stronger than ever in the end, trust me.

No fear is irrational. It’s a reflection of our insecurities. And once a while, our dreams become a reflection of our insecurities.

Are you being haunted in your dream by your ex?

If yes, then it might be that your heart is afraid of facing a similar kind of pain again.

Hence, you shut yourself off and get the guards high.

However, you should try to disintegrate him and the emotions associated with him, and not let it govern your life. Who knows? There might be someone else singing, “I know I can treat you better than he can”.

Consider taking a leap of faith and finding a connection for what it’s worth.

If you’re already in a relationship, objectively review the current relationship and see how different it is from your past relationship.

That will help you build a better relationship with your current flame. Express yourself and be honest at all times. Honesty will take to places.

Don’t let the memories of a former flame drag you down!

4. You Are Reclaiming What You Lost in the Relationship


You fall in love and then the love leaves you struck in the streets when it ends.

You have the tendency to sever all ties with your ex, even if that means losing a part of yourself.

I understand it quite well. When a part of you reminds you of everything about what

and how he used to be, it becomes quite difficult to hold on to that part.

But as time passes by, we tend to acknowledge the part that we lost in the process of moving on. Have you thought how unfair it is to you to let a positive thing disappear out of you?

If you’ve been dreaming about him and particularly, the trait that has gone missing in you post break-up, maybe now is the time to reanalyze and see that doing so isn’t helpful.

How about reclaiming the lost part of you again?

You are missing out on the playfulness of youth.

Go outdoors! Bring out the best in you and live while you’re young.

5. You Are Now Dealing with the Issues Which You Associate with Your Ex


Could you take a moment to reflect on your past relationship? Because I have another concept in my mind as to why you might be having dreams about your ex.

Get ready to answer a row of questions.

Where were you when the break-up happened? What led to it?

Did he cheat on you, or even worse, did you catch him red-handed? Or was it a mistake in your end? How traumatic did it prove to be?

I know this interrogation isn’t going to make you feel any better. I’m just trying to have an outlook on the things that have made you believe your present fling is pulling off the same deed.

Do you think he is cheating on you or are you struggling to put your trust in him?

If so, you might want to deal with your emotions even if you don’t feel the need to.

Sometimes, your heart is trying to convey a message and the worse you can do is ignore it. That’s why you end up having a dream about it.

Without your knowledge, you might have adopted some put-downs or inner thoughts when the past relationship ended. Maybe that is why your dreams are trying to act as a spiritual and emotional thermometer, and attempting to give you a better insight of things.

Running away and living in a shell, much? It’s time to acknowledge the fact that the heart is trying to tell you, because in the end of it all, the heart wants what it wants.


Whether it be a dream of a teacher you had a crush on in high-school or of an ex, there’s nothing wrong with it.

Everything good or bad that happens in our life gets pushed back in the subconscious and hence, we dream.

Dreaming about someone you’ve cut ties with is one of the most common dream themes.

By all means, your heart wants you to rediscover your inner self and move on feeling complete with no parts missing, and in the end, so shall you be!

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